Look in your heart....you'll know...

Be sure and click over to Kyria.com and read my newest article, Does Faith Hide Marital Abuse? 

My last post was about bullies.  Several people were concerned when I said that bullies were parent made.  So much media attention has been placed on a bully's actions rather than on the origin of learning.  We must find the initial cause in order to combat the problem.  Otherwise we are forever dealing with topical symptoms. 

This morning on Fox, one of the contributing judges was talking about a case in Detroit.  You can read about it on Fox News  It's about a little girl who is dying with Huntington's disease.  Apparently she had a birthday party a couple of years ago and didn't invite a neighbor to the party.  The mother was so enraged that she began a cyber bully campaign against the deceased mother (who had died from the same disease) and the living child.  The bullying included driving past the house with a coffin on a trailer, signs of crossbones over the little girl and an interview with reporters where the neighbor said she received great satisfaction from bullying these dying people. 

The judge was commenting on the fact that the DA is currently investigating the possibility of a crime and protective services has taken the bullies two children out of their home.  Good thing!  She's not only seriously disturbed....but her children were learning how to bully and torment others.  All for the sake of an invitation to a party.  Hum...I wouldn't have invited her either.

The judge was really hot under the collar about this one.  I watched as she ranted and raved about how awful this was.  I smiled and thought to myself, "See there.  Most people know where bullies come from, they are just afraid to say it."  That's the way most parenting information is perceived.  We know that parents are responsible for their children, but that doesn't make people feel good.  News media doesn't want to seem like they are preaching.  They don't want anyone to feel bad about their parenting skills.  So we rock along allowing parents to make bad decisions until we are finally faced with a horrible incident like this one. 

The real deal is this.  Look in your heart.  Listen to your children and the people around you.  If it feels wrong or angry or abusive - it probably is.  So stop it!  I've always liked to use the scripture Phillipians 4:8-9
It's great parenting advice!

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.(Debbie's paraphrase - "Parent on these things")  Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.

Children watch everything we do.  If you do it....so will your children.  If you want to have great children who turn into terrific adults - do everything you can to draw a path to greatness.  Your children may surpass you and do even greater things than you have done....but it will probably be walking the same path you walk.  You can do it!  You can give your child a better life.  Set the example high and you'll never regret it!

Seeking His Wisdom,

Debbie